Showing posts with label teenagers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label teenagers. Show all posts

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Raising children after the divorce

Hummm…nope most newlyweds never would imagine there would come a day when they wouldn’t be together. The differences that use to attract you to your mate now make you scream! The beautiful children you’ve brought in this world now have to be parented from different houses; or can we come together as one, for the sake of the children?

I struggle with this difficult decision now! I pray for divine intervention, because I know there has to be strength with the master.

Everyone will agree raising a teenager is no easy feat; so to add parental tension only increases the potential for hasty decisions by the non-custodial parent. Minor situations get blown out of proportion and major issues become a cyclone of emotions for all parties involved. As the custodial parent, all you want is to ensure that you produce a healthy, moralistic, intelligent individual. All-the-while, you wonder how the non-custodial parent lost the “Parental Map” you designed while you were together.

How did C’s on a report move to the “It doesn’t matter list” when we saw that our offspring had the potential of excelling in all course curriculums? It was evident that A’s and B’s were attainable, especially when the child completed the assigned work and turns it in.

How did detention move to “It’s ok, because it’s your first one”? Although this is your first detention, this behavior is inexcusable and will not be accepted. Did I step off of the planet and end up on Mars because now we are divorced? Although we could not find a balance in the marriage, can we be on one accord for the child and not send mixed messages for the duration of this raising period?

Can someone answer this question: Is it possible to raise our child on one accord, or do I have to tell my child the non-custodial parent is a jerk and please do not follow any of their advice until after we (custodial parent & child) have discussed the matter at hand first?

Chocolate Wedge

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Hobo's Question of the Day

Whatever happened to the true belief in “It takes a village to raise a child”?
Have we as a society become so self involved and isolated from our neighbors that we are allowing an entire generation to walk the path of no return?
I ask this question because not to long ago when I was a child, there were certain “rules” that my friends and I never questioned or went against.
On many occasions, I have noticed children just standing at street corners (long after the street lights were on) on a school night, with no adult supervision, and what seems to be no apparent destination.
I have witnessed a couple of my friend’s children ignore their parents when their name is called or say “what do you want” when they do respond. One of my friend’s children actually ran away because his parents did not allow him to “hang out” with his friends, because he had failed most of his classes in school.
Yet the thing that is causing me the greatest concern is the amount of children who are committing crimes and killing one another. It seems as if there is an entire generation of children who just do not care.
So my question: As someone who does not have any children, what is my part (if any) in reinforcing more positive attitudes for children to witness and/or model after? What can we as a society do to insure that children are no longer witness to so much negativity, believe that it is acceptable to disrespect their neighbor, and start believing in a more positive and productive future.

Looking for answers,

Hobo Bag
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