Keep praying and don't give up!

My 18 year old son will be leaving for the navy in three days. My baby will be out on his own. You see I have so many mixed emotions about this. First of all he is my only child and doesn’t currently live with me. We said our good byes last weekend while he visited with me for a few days. But the mixed emotions are based on the realization that he is a young man now about to enter into the next chapter of his life. A chapter that I honestly didn’t always believe would happen.

Let me explain, my son wasn’t really a bad kid he was just like any other typical teenage boy, gave me the blues on a regular basis. He lived with his dad and then he lived with me and then back with his dad. But it didn’t matter where he was living, the school environment never motivated him. He was average at school at best and it was like pulling teeth to get him to do anything. But I continued to pray. He got suspended for fighting, he was constantly getting F’s because he didn’t do any homework and barely studied, but I continued to pray. There were days where I swear I wanted to put my foot so far up his butt but instead I just continued to pray.

Then there was this last transition; the one where I gave him a choice to finish out his junior and senior year with me or go back with his dad. Immediately before I finished the question he said “I want to live with Dad”. It hurt but I did feel like he was in need of dad time so I let him go. Let me explain one other thing, you see at my house there is structure but at his dad’s not so much. I’m not saying that he is not a good father; he just runs his household much differently than I do.

Well after being there for about a month my son called me to tell me he had made the wrong decision. He said that he forgot to look at the big picture like I always tell him to do. Instead he jumped for the instant gratification. So that was the day that I learned all of my lecturing didn’t actually fall on deaf ears. So I explained to him that things would get better and that he needed to give it more time. Of course I could have immediately put plans in motion to have him move back with me but I wanted to teach my son that in life sometimes we do make wrong choices but that doesn’t mean we can’t make it work. So he stayed with his dad and things got better for him.

The next lesson came on the day of his graduation. I was watching him fidget while he waited for his name to be called. I sent him a text asking if he was okay. His answer is something I’ll cherish: “I’m nervous, I can’t believe this it. Mom, I just want to say I know I put you through a lot but you never gave up on me and I thank you for that, I luv u!” So of course the water works began! Again, all my lecturing didn’t fall on deaf ears.

I never gave up but I admit to feeling very nervous and having my doubts about his future, but I continued to pray as I still do. They told me when he was young that he had Attention Deficit Disorder I told them no I’ll change his diet and I continued to pray. They told me that he might need to be placed in a special education class, I told them no I’ll put him in SCORE and I continued to pray. He brought home more F’s then A’s but I continued to pray. Now it’s August 23, 2009 and he will be going into the navy studying to be a Turbine Mechanical Engineer because he scored so well on the test! He just needed to find something he was interested in and he needed to know that no matter what that I still believed in him.

Parents don’t give up! Parenting is probably one of the hardest jobs in the world but it is very rewarding. I am so very proud of my son because he has grown into a very nice young man. So parents hold on, continue to pray and don’t give up!

Luv later

Stiletto

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